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Subject: Goodbye Squirrel

GOODBYE SQUIRREL 
By Cletus T. Judd               
Asher Lohman 
 
To The Tune Of Dixie Chicks "Goodbye Earl" 
 
(Be very, very quiet) 
 
(We are hunting, something) 
 
 
C                                            F    
Me and Harold Muffert were outdoors men 
 
C                                        G 
Set in our backwoods ways 
 
C                                      F 
Both members of the hunting club 
 
          C                       G   C 
Both active in the NRA    (National Redneck Association) 
 
C                                                            F                 
         
We scouted a location where we had no doubt 
 
C                                                             G 
We’d kill the biggest buck in the world     (about a 34 pointer) 
 
C 
Harold waited in his tree-stand  
 
        C         G                   C 
But all he seen was a squirrel. 
 
C                                                        F 
Thing ‘er two weeks since the season started 
 
                                                   G 
And neither one of us was amused 
 
                     C                            F 
We had on real tree camo, high powered ammo 
 
        C           G             C 
But no big game to shoot 
 
C                                                       F 
Then we finally saw a deer as big as a horse 
 
C                                                 G 
Harold had him in his crosshairs (shoot him!) 
 
                C                                       F  
But that squirrel jumped off a branch above us 
 
         C                       G             C      
And landed in Harold’s hair    (What is that thang, get it out!!) 
 
               Am 
Harold fell off the stand 
 
              G 
On his head he landed 
 
              F                                         C 
Like a wimp he laid there and cried 
 
           Am 
Till I climbed on down 
 
G 
Picked him up off the ground 
 
              F                                      G 
And it didn’t take us long to decide 
 
                                       C      F      C 
That squirrel had to die! 
 
                                                      G      F   
(ha ha ha ha ha ha ha)  Goodbye Squirrel! 
 
                                C       F      C 
With black eyed peas     (mmm, mmm, mmm) 
 
                                                 G      F 
Your gonna taste good to me squirrel 
 
                  C 
It’s you or me 
 
                  G                 F    
Come on outta that tree squirrel 
 
                     C      F      C   
Hey guess what 
 
                                            G     F             C    F        
C    F              
You’ve eaten your last nut squirrel 
 
C                                                             F 
Me and Harold went down to the surplus store 
 
C                             G 
Bought a keg of dynamite 
 
C                                            F                                 
            C                  G                C  
Two baseball bats and a case of M 80’s we were in for one heck of a fight  
(we’ll show you!) 
 
C                                           F 
When your huntin with dumb and dumber 
 
C                                                        G  
Something surely bound to go wrong (now be careful) 
 
                     C                                            F 
And when Harold lit that real short fuse 
 
   C               G   
I knew it wouldn’t be long 
 
                    Am 
When the dynamite blew 
 
                  G 
Harold’s foot did too 
 
F                                       C  
And fingers began to fly 
 
                  Am                                    G        
We were barely alive when the game warden ‘rived 
 
          F                     G 
And much to our surprise 
 
                                      C    F      C 
That squirrel didn’t die! 
 
                                             G        F   
(ha ha ha ha ha ha) Goodbye squirrel! 
 
 
                           C 
Just one more shot 
 
F                      C                   G           F 
You’ll be in my crock pot squirrel 
 
                             C   F   C 
You’ll make a lunch 
 
                                        G          F 
You overgrown chipmunk, squirrel 
 
                          C      F      C 
I’ll skin your hide 
 
                                                  G             F              
                 
And make a hat when it’s dried 
 
C            F            C          G           F               C 
Squirrel 
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